« Sweet Beatrice | Main | Erotic Love...Part II »

October 09, 2006



How well do I feel your pain! It only takes one time of being busted by your child and pretending to be wrestling that the magic is GONE! How refreshing to know I am not alone! You may want to consider sending them to their grandparents' house to visit and staying in! We have done that a few times and it is refreshing and quite affordable! I enjoyed your blog! Thanks!


I can relate to the "I'm just too tired" thing. By 8 PM, I'm wiped out! :( And my hubby's overtures are more annoying than anything else.

If anyone has any advice, I'd like to hear about it too.

Annie ;)

Her Bad Mother

French maid's uniform? That'd be a bitch to launder and iron. Now, SaranWrap - *that's* disposable.

Efficiency in all things, people.

creative type dad (tony)

This is tough, trust me. Much more for a guy. I think a husband's greatest fear about having kids is more about not having sex as often.


Grab asses randomly during the day...touch touch touch...whisper dirty little thangs in each others ears whilst cooking up dinner...flirt...kiss each other often and with passion (nothing too gross out but it's OK to kiss in front of your kiddos...this way...they learn now to imbue passion into their lives when older)...fight about sex and then go make up...flirt...give a massage with no "goal" in mind...kiss...look each other in the eye...breathe...FLIRT...


OY! You know it's bad when you're child has a two-hour drop-off birthday party, and there's no suggestion by either adult to make a mad dash home for a little "mommy & daddy time."

We need a solution, and we need one NOW! :O


Oh the dirth of freaky freaky that comes after the babies... Most of the time, it's the old "just too damn tired" excuse. Every now and again, though, the wild hare strikes and there is a week or so of unbridled, exuberant lovemaking. Followed by a few weeks of recovery, since necessarily this involves using up time that would normally be filled with heavy duty sleeping.

Everything in life is a trade-off, isn't it? And then, there is the unavoidable embarrassment of having your preschooler suddenly come upon a pair of handcuffs and some rather difficult-to-explain items of clothing. That's always fun, too. "Yes, baby, sometimes mommy needs to dress up like she's going to school..."

But, alas, I fear I have said too too much....


I really don't think there's a good solution to this problem, especially when the kids are small. It's just so restrictive. You can't do some crazy fantasy thing in the living room with props as you say, because one of the kids will probably come out of their bedroom wanting a glass of water. I have read a bit of Perel's book and am waiting to see if she comes up with any answers, but for the moment even the couple with an open marriage have a so-so sex life with each other.


I also think it is more difficult to talk about sex issues after you married. When you are single and dating, talking about sex is... sexy. Once you are together, it takes on more "meaning" about the relationship, which takes some of the "fun" out of it.

Andie D.

I barely remember what that is. For us it's usually something like this: "Hey honey.... The kids are in bed." Wink. Wink.

Not exactly romantic, but if I wait too long after they go to sleep, I'll be asleep too.

My hub actually asked me if we could maybe have a glass of wine first, snuggle on the couch, talk or something. I think he's a chick. ;)


When you do figure out how to add the erotic into everyday life, please don't forget to post about it! I know I could sure use any advice I can get!


Do you have my address? No. Let me send it to you.

Pack up your stuff, come here for coffee and coversation, and let's dish about this hot topic that is near and dear to MY heart as well. Imbuing the world around me with eroticism is difficult and if there's a book to be read about it, I'll all about the book.

Great post. Anything on Salon.com is worth a read, though. I'm going to spend the rest of my day there now probably. So. Thanks a lot.

There goes the eroticism in MY house for the day. ;-)

Darci McGrath

This is a topic near and dear to my heart. With 2 teenagers in the house even disguised enuendos are picked up. How do you keep that going until you get your own pad again when all the birds have left the nest...that is the question. We smile a lot and sit really close to each other and yes have a lock on the door...but it still can be a chore.

The comments to this entry are closed.

Also Writing At...

Crazy Hip Blog Mamas

Cool Mama Books